Skittle Pizza

November 17, 2009 at 12:19 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 26 Comments
Tags: alexa vega, amy's cream of tomato soup, anorexia, banana, best foods to eat when nauseous, betty crocker, bland foods, cascadian farms, cooking, cranberry stuffing, disney classic, easy bake oven, eating disorder, ezekiel, fage, hemp bagel, hemp plus granola, julzdanceruns, mi-del honey grahams, nutella, pumpkin pie clif bar, pumpkin quinoa, rose water, self love, sick, sleepover, vegetarian, winter squash

It was the second official day of her ailment. The ailment that had kept her bedridden the previous day.

When she first awoke, Karina swallowed what felt like one hundred sharp blades. Her head throbbed with savage intensity and her arms felt like they could disintegrate at any moment.

Mr. ED wanted to kill her for feeling too sick to fidget, waltz, and shake. Whenever she stood up, the world around her would reel and whirl about in circles. The girl was in no position to stand around her home for hours upon hours, waiting for ED’s permission to take a seat or catch her breath.

She’d had the strength, however, to ignore his orders the day before and even got in some calories despite her sour stomach. The number of legitimate excuses to not reach calorie goals are scarce. Whether one has a sore throat, upset stomach, or broken nose… the food possibilities to get calories in are endless!

Sure, ED’s “you are too sick to eat” excuse will always be a classic, but it sure is a poor one.

Sunday’s breakfast: 1 packet of instant oatmeal cooked in 1/2 c. hemp milk, 1/2 a mashed banana, 4 drops of rose water, 2 egg whites, and 2 tbsp. almond butter. This bowl of oatmeal was perfect for a sensitive throat as it was easy to get down. To make it easier on the stomach, nix the eggs for a flavorful, yet bland, oatmeal concoction!

Although Karina’s stomach felt better, her throat had taken a turn for the worse overnight, so she chose to say no to heated foods. Instead, she took 1 c. of Fage 2% yogurt and topped it with 3/4 c. of Hemp Plus granola, 20g. of Ezekiel Golden Flax cereal, blueberries, maple syrup and sunflower seeds seasoned with pumpkin pie spice, cinnamon, and nutmeg. She froze it for approx. 30 minutes, and the result was a tasty, frozen breakfast treat.

She decided to surprise her busy, waffle-cooking mother with a new oatmeal recipe just for her! 1 packet of instant oatmeal cooked in 1/2 c. hemp milk, 4 drops of rose water, 2 tbsp. Nutella, 1 sliced banana, and vanilla extract then topped it with 5g. coconut shreds and 2 crushed Mi-Del whole wheat honey grahams. Spiced with nutmeg and cinnamon.

Her mother was impressed and raved that it was the most delicious breakfast she’d ever eaten. A hit!

Victor, Karina’s eccentric older brother, invited her to watch Sleepover in the game room after breakfast. Sleepover was a cheesy, girl-powered  fun fest starring Alexa Vega which brought back memories of her own bygone sleepovers.

Memories of video-making, suicide hotline prank calls (“my father rapes me with stuffed animals!”), and other random acts of mischief returned to her mind. She recalled an occasion when her and a friend ordered pepperoni pizzas to all of their enemies’ homes to get back at them for being such jerks.

While she realized that all of these acts were obnoxious and inappropriate, she also remembered that she had fun. She had fun experimenting with skittles over pizza, her first risqué Halloween costume (home-made denim skirt Playboy bunny), and even her first and last cigarette (she hated it!).

This was all a part of “growing up”, a beautiful experience in life which Karina felt she was missing out on at the moment.

She had no period, few friends, and had no interest in boys. She threw temper tantrums, was obsessed with Disney classics, and held a grudge against her parents for never giving her an Easy Bake Oven.

It was as if she were a nine year old trapped inside a high school junior’s body. A calorie-obsessed high school junior to be exact.

Karina sighed as the movie credits rolled and pressed the TV’s “off” button.

She had some major ED sabotage to perform.

***************

Karina lay like a fresh corpse on her game room couch, unmoved from the position she was in an hour before. The poor girl was the image of death and decomposition….. and was known for hyperbolic statements (just kidding, I really do feel like crap, though.)

Her weekend had been stressful: 3 hour ballet class on Friday, company and Nutcracker rehearsal from 10-6 on Saturday, illness and more Nutcracker rehearsal on Sunday (she only “marked” the dance). She adored this crazy dancer lifestyle but unsurprisingly felt overwhelmed at times. This was the reason for her usual blogland absences on weekends. She’d never disappear because she didn’t love her blog friends. In fact, she actually felt closer to her blog friends than some of the people she had met through school and what not. <3

For lunch, she prepared a bowl of 3/4 c. quinoa with a 1/2 c. pumpkin, sliced egg plant, 1/4 c. vegan cheddar cheese, diced tomatoes, pumpkin seeds, maple syrup, onions, garlic, and a medley of spices. (full recipe will be posted on the recipe pages under the Lunch & Dinner link)

This meal gave Karina that warm, wholesome feeling she got whenever she ate a delicious, yet nutritious meal. It was possible to nourish both her body and soul with food. She shuddered when she remembered those cold, bitter days spent in New York last Christmas when she was in the cavernous depths of her Eating Disorder.

The thought of consuming just baby food and egg whites for breakfast, and a tuna cup for dinner made her want to cry. She had done her body wrong and felt so,so sorry:

“Dear Body,” she wrote. “I am sorry that I have put you through such turmoil and stress. I should have listened to all of those occasions where you begged me for food in the middle of the night and cried for me to pay attention… and I chose to ignore you.

I am sorry that I treated you so poorly, as though you were something of no value. I expected so much out of you, yet gave you nothing in return. I would work you to exhaustion, lash at you with the leather whip of Anorexia, and order you to carry on.

I am sorry, body. I am so, so, terribly sorry. I promise to never cause you intended harm or damage ever again, and I promise to treat you with the respect and love that you deserve.

Thank you for always being there for me.

Love, Karina.”

***************

Pre-Ballet snack: Cookies & Cream Clif Builders Bar topped with 12 g. almond butter

Yes, Karina was sick, but truly had no choice but to go to class at this pointe (hah! ballet humor!) This Friday would be BTH’s opening night of The Nutcracker and some of the choreography she was a part of still needed to be cleaned up. Dress rehearsal was set for Thursday, and she had two other performances that same Saturday. Not to mention, she was in all three casts for all her roles. This little ballerina was in for a crazy week.

***************

Thanks to rest and a cocktail of antibiotics, Karina did not pass away at ballet class. In fact, she did rather well and was even praised for her pas de bourrée piqué dessous. Not too shabby for a young lady with a fever!

Her dinner consisted of a very burnt hemp bagel toasted with vegetarian salami slices, 2 vegan American cheese slices, a 100 calorie pack of guacamole and a side of spinach and carrots.

Karina thought back on her morning and prior days. She felt almost grateful for her strong indisposition for it gave her no choice but to lie down, take it easy, and rest. As she had discovered in the past, sometimes all it took was one intrepid time to overcome a fear. One time. And thanks to her muscle aches, sore throat and weakness, Karina Pinzon no longer feared the couch. The couch that once took on the form of a beast in her eyes.

Oh, how she loved showing ED who the big kahuna was. After all, she’d always been a bossy girl.

The End.

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Hello everyone! Both yesterday and today were special days for me as I sat the majority of the time! I never thought I would find myself relaxing again. Now I just have to work on the fidgeting… which I think will be the hardest rule to break. I am, however, going to take the famous “one step at a time” advice. I believe this is a very good guideline to not frighten yourself, yet still continue to make progress.

Anyhow, one of my favorite girls on the planet, Eliza, tagged me for this fun Autumn survey! I love you, beautiful . I want you and Maya to hang in there, I know today was a hard day. <3

1. favorite variety of apple? Gala

2. apples dipped in? Almond or peanut butter! With cinnamon. Mmmm

3. favorite way to enjoy pumpkin? It used to be pumpkin oats… until I had a taste of today’s Pumpkin Quinoa at lunch. Oh my God, it was delicious. The bowl of pumpkin cereal I had on Friday was pretty incredible too. It was inspired by a comment posted on Kashi’s GOLEAN Cereal page by: Julzdanceruns, who happens to be really sweet 1 c. Kashi GOLEAN cooked with 2 egg whites, applesauce, maple syrup and a 1/2 c. of Cascadian Farms winter squash. Once the cereal was cooked, I topped it with cranberries, pumpkin seeds, and cottage cheese. It was then seasoned, of course, with cinnamon, nutmeg, and pumpkin pie spice.

4. favorite soup? with crackers or bread? Definitely Amy’s cream of tomato soup… but not just with crackers or bread. It must be accompanied with a grilled cheese sandwich. Yep!

5. do you eat orange foods all year round? Yes! My taste buds always seem to hanker for some orange. You can never keep me away from pumpkin, sweet potatoes, carrots, winter squashes, etc.

6. most used spice in your autumn cooking: Cinnamon, nutmeg, and pumpkin pie spice

7. you are baking some homemade bread, what flavor combination of bread would you like to make? “gingerbread with crystallized ginger.or pumpkin bread with cranberries and walnuts. and of course carrot cake” <—- I steal Eliza’s answer

8. favorite autumn vegetables and ways to eat it? Sweet potatoes and butternut squash sprinkled with nutmeg and cinnamon, dipped in almond butter and sometimes a bit of maple syrup. This is heaven!

9. hot chocolate, hot cider, coffee or tea? COFFEEE. Black. I also adore a nice mug of hot chocolate or warm tea with honey.

10. favorite seasonal dessert? Gingerbread and pumpkin pie. Sugar cookies.

11. lets make a fall stew! pick any 6 ingredients to create your one: Lentils, tomatoes, zucchini, butternut squash, tomato paste, peas, and corn. That was actually 7.

12. pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, walnuts or almonds to snack on? Salted almonds.

13. popcorn flavor/seasoning? Buttery with a lot of salt. What? I have low blood pressure

14. bowl of hot cereal you have been wanting to try: Mitri’s Vegetarian Taco Salad Oats. They look so delicious and unique.

15. post a link to a recipe that you recently bookmarked: Cranberry Stuffing Recipe by Betty Crocker.

Before I go, I remember someone asked me if I was a vegetarian through comments the other day… I tried to find the comment so that I could acknowledge the person who asked it, but failed. Hopefully you read this, but yes I am a vegetarian! I just made the full and official switch about a month ago and I must say that I am very happy with my new lifestyle

Alright, lovelies. Have a terrific Tuesday tomorrow! And again, I apologize if I don’t comment blogs very much this week… I am reading, however, and keeping everybody in my thoughts. I send hugs & kisses to everybody!